Friday, August 11, 2006
Is Art Howe the Smoking Man?
A few days ago, cnnsi.com had a photo gallery of the best rookie closers of all time, due to the success of Little Papi. Looking through brought up a couple of familiar names, and one in particular that stood out: Billy Koch. The reason that his name stood out is that he is still relatively young, and I hadn't heard his name in ages. Don’t get me wrong, I always thought he was overrated and basically sucked, but that doesn’t mean that he couldn’t have a major league job. For some reason, I equate him to Jason Isringhausen – also a crappy closer, but he surely can pitch in the majors.
Anyhow, I did a quick search and his stats show that his last game was in 2004. As usual, Wikipedia saved the day, reporting that Koch was signed by the Blue Jays after 2004, but released during spring training. When that happened, he vowed not to sign with another team in order to leave the Blue Jays on the hook for the year’s salary. Further, he attended a Blue Jays-Devil Rays game and heckled the Jays. Certainly a classy move, but not the reason for the post.
The last sentence of his entry casually mentions that Koch’s family claims to suffer from Morgellons Disease. Has anyone heard of this? It is a disease for which there is no medical explanation. Koch’s wife says that symptoms include “matter and black specks coming out and off my skin.” These filaments “literally ooze out of [her] skin.” For Billy, this led to “uncontrollable muscle twitching,” which is at least partly blamed for his prolonged absence from baseball (and presumed retirement). It sounds almost X-Files-ish. This is all well and good. Koch may or may not be a weirdo. Why am I posting? Because Morgellons disease is found in two places – Florida and THE BAY AREA. In totally-related news, I’m going to be moving. Soon. Somewhere. Away from San Francisco. The truth may be out there, but I’m outta here.
Anyhow, I did a quick search and his stats show that his last game was in 2004. As usual, Wikipedia saved the day, reporting that Koch was signed by the Blue Jays after 2004, but released during spring training. When that happened, he vowed not to sign with another team in order to leave the Blue Jays on the hook for the year’s salary. Further, he attended a Blue Jays-Devil Rays game and heckled the Jays. Certainly a classy move, but not the reason for the post.
The last sentence of his entry casually mentions that Koch’s family claims to suffer from Morgellons Disease. Has anyone heard of this? It is a disease for which there is no medical explanation. Koch’s wife says that symptoms include “matter and black specks coming out and off my skin.” These filaments “literally ooze out of [her] skin.” For Billy, this led to “uncontrollable muscle twitching,” which is at least partly blamed for his prolonged absence from baseball (and presumed retirement). It sounds almost X-Files-ish. This is all well and good. Koch may or may not be a weirdo. Why am I posting? Because Morgellons disease is found in two places – Florida and THE BAY AREA. In totally-related news, I’m going to be moving. Soon. Somewhere. Away from San Francisco. The truth may be out there, but I’m outta here.
# posted by Big Thunder @ 2:25 PM 
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An alternative theory: We're carriers of this mystery ailment. The person who named the disease lived in Pennsylvania, a familiar place for all of us; one hot spot is the Bay Area, home of Big Thunder; and the other is Florida, where the fourth mystery 'meater briefly attended med school and later settled down with his new bride. If this thing starts breaking out in New Jersey, I'm going to voluntarily quarantine myself.
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